I have been contemplating if my daughter should continue to be in the GATE program in her school. I know she is wonderful but is it just because I am her Mother? Am I seeing the truth? Is she really special??? She will always be special to me because she is my baby girl no matter what the school says and I know God will use her in a big way. She is going to get an IQ test on Wednesday and we will see what they think.
All of this made me ask myself if I am special...everyone keeps telling me I am because I am being a surrogate. This bothers me a little, not that it is bad or I cannot take a complement just that I feel it is normal for me. It just fits me and it feels right. It is like someone who can sing really good but does not know it, then they sing for someone and they are told for the first time they are an awesome singer. Yeah, that is how I feel. It's normal for me but extraordinary for others.
Praying about this God has shown me that this is a gift he has given to me and I am special. That makes me :-) God thinks I'm special!
I got some news today that I have to go back to New York to have the sonogram done next week. I am happy that I get to go back but I am also sad because Allen will not be coming. We had babysitter issues last time and he cannot get off of work so it will be better if he stays. Now I have to find someone to go with me...which you would think would be easy but school just started and it is right after Labor day so everyone has extra days off that week already. I hope some one can come I do not want to go by myself but if I have to I will. Worst of all I have to have it arranged by tomorrow!!!!
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Great test!
My numbers are doubling as they should be so I am very happy! My Sonogram is scheduled for September 6th I am very excited to see the little baby in my belly!
I am feeling the mood swings of the pregnancy this week. I have had a couple of episodes where my emotions just well up and I gave in. I need to be more aware of it and pray before I react. Doing that will be better for everyone!
We changed insurances because Allen was offered insurance through his work. It is not the greatest but it covers more than our old insurance and it will actually be cheaper. Now we have to wait for our cards.
I talked to the parents about how they want the birth to go and they want me to have the baby in a hospital. I am fine with that I was hoping to have the baby in a birthing center but I came to find out that Las Vegas does not have any birthing center. The midwives I talked to said it was a political thing...I do not know but it is weird. Since they want me to have it in a hospital I can not go to a midwife because they do not deliver in hospitals. So I am going to go back to the doctor office that I went to when I had Kaileb. I liked the office but not really the doctor I went to so I am going to try a different Doctor in that office. I will keep you updated on the progress.
I am feeling the mood swings of the pregnancy this week. I have had a couple of episodes where my emotions just well up and I gave in. I need to be more aware of it and pray before I react. Doing that will be better for everyone!
We changed insurances because Allen was offered insurance through his work. It is not the greatest but it covers more than our old insurance and it will actually be cheaper. Now we have to wait for our cards.
I talked to the parents about how they want the birth to go and they want me to have the baby in a hospital. I am fine with that I was hoping to have the baby in a birthing center but I came to find out that Las Vegas does not have any birthing center. The midwives I talked to said it was a political thing...I do not know but it is weird. Since they want me to have it in a hospital I can not go to a midwife because they do not deliver in hospitals. So I am going to go back to the doctor office that I went to when I had Kaileb. I liked the office but not really the doctor I went to so I am going to try a different Doctor in that office. I will keep you updated on the progress.
Sunday, August 22, 2010
HCG test
It is funny that even now when I take an HCG test I get scared it will be negative. With the Mother's history of losing her babies before 12 weeks I will be uneasy until the 12 week mark. The loss of this child would be horrible. I know the baby is not mine but it is a life and something I do not want to lose. I am doing this to help the family have a baby, and that is what I pray I will do. When I have the ultrasound I think that will help ease my mind, just to see the baby.
I have found out that the third party contact next week will have a Chinese coordinator so that I do not have to go through the doctor's office to contact the parents. I am hopeful that I will have more contact with them when that happens. I am sure they have the same or more concerns that I do about the baby. After 12 weeks we will all be more comfortable.
I have one more HCG test next week before the ultrasound...I pray it will be good :-)
I have found out that the third party contact next week will have a Chinese coordinator so that I do not have to go through the doctor's office to contact the parents. I am hopeful that I will have more contact with them when that happens. I am sure they have the same or more concerns that I do about the baby. After 12 weeks we will all be more comfortable.
I have one more HCG test next week before the ultrasound...I pray it will be good :-)
Sunday, August 15, 2010
God, his part
I do not think I explain how much I know God is a part of this surrogacy. I have felt the pull to be a surrogate since I was pregnant with my son who is 4 now. I feel God did not let me get pregnant with my own child so that I could do surrogacy for this family. I have prayed that he will use me to minister to others and I think this is it. I am not sure on the details but I am going to take it step by step.
Pregnancy is such a miracle, even with all the doctors do it is up to God to make it stick. I feel I did everything wrong at the transfer. We had to leave the hotel by 10 so we left earlier and walked around New York. We were on an airplane 24 hours after the transfer. We were intimate after we found out I was pregnant. All the things I have read say to be on Bed rest for at least 24 hours, not to travel for at least 3 days, and no intimacy for longer then the doctor's office said...2 days after transfer! It seems like every office has a different plan but it's God who is in charge. It takes God's helping hand to make the transfer work or not.
I am glad that God let it work for me because it shows me that I am on his path not my own.
Pregnancy is such a miracle, even with all the doctors do it is up to God to make it stick. I feel I did everything wrong at the transfer. We had to leave the hotel by 10 so we left earlier and walked around New York. We were on an airplane 24 hours after the transfer. We were intimate after we found out I was pregnant. All the things I have read say to be on Bed rest for at least 24 hours, not to travel for at least 3 days, and no intimacy for longer then the doctor's office said...2 days after transfer! It seems like every office has a different plan but it's God who is in charge. It takes God's helping hand to make the transfer work or not.
I am glad that God let it work for me because it shows me that I am on his path not my own.
Great test results at an evil lab
I went to Lab Corp. yesterday to check my progesterone, estrogen, and HCG levels. I normally go to Quest but the office is closed on Saturday. It started out ruff when i sat in the waiting room for 45 min. When I was finally callen up the secratary could not find my orders so she handed me the stack of about 50 peoples orders and told me to find mine! I could not believe it! "Is she for real?" is all I could think. My orders were the second page in the huge stack. When I showed her she looked it over and said where is your name? It was right there in BOLD!
On to the next problem...They wanted me to pay with my credit card and would not let me have my test done unless I produced one. I tried to explain to them I am a surrogate and they are supposed to bill the doctor but if they could not do that then they could just bill me. No, no, no, they could not do that. I called my third party contact for the surrogacy and he tried to give them the parents credit card but they would not take that either!!! Oh and my order was STAT so it needed to be done right away. So finally the highest ranking tech who kept repeating, my hands are tied,my hands are tied, called her manager and she said to do the test.
So I got the test and I was grateful it was over...or so I thought. I called the lab to get my results and the same Secretary answered the phone. I promptly identified myself and she remembered me from all the issues we had. She told me that she would give me my results if I did not call and complain about her. What????? Now she is going to bribe me with my results!!! I could not believe it! I wanted to make sure everything was going well with the pregnancy so I said yes. She told me she would get them and call me back. After waiting for her call I called her and she kept saying she will give them to me...she did not! I felt so used and mistreated. I miss Quest they are always so nice. I will never do testing on the weekend again.
I did get a call from the doctor today and my level is a 86 which is double what it was last time and that is exactly what we want.
After it all, I am happy.
On to the next problem...They wanted me to pay with my credit card and would not let me have my test done unless I produced one. I tried to explain to them I am a surrogate and they are supposed to bill the doctor but if they could not do that then they could just bill me. No, no, no, they could not do that. I called my third party contact for the surrogacy and he tried to give them the parents credit card but they would not take that either!!! Oh and my order was STAT so it needed to be done right away. So finally the highest ranking tech who kept repeating, my hands are tied,my hands are tied, called her manager and she said to do the test.
So I got the test and I was grateful it was over...or so I thought. I called the lab to get my results and the same Secretary answered the phone. I promptly identified myself and she remembered me from all the issues we had. She told me that she would give me my results if I did not call and complain about her. What????? Now she is going to bribe me with my results!!! I could not believe it! I wanted to make sure everything was going well with the pregnancy so I said yes. She told me she would get them and call me back. After waiting for her call I called her and she kept saying she will give them to me...she did not! I felt so used and mistreated. I miss Quest they are always so nice. I will never do testing on the weekend again.
I did get a call from the doctor today and my level is a 86 which is double what it was last time and that is exactly what we want.
After it all, I am happy.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
I'm Prego!!!
This is the first picture of many to come I plan to take a picture each month. I am so excited for the family and that it worked!!!
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Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Glad to be home
The trip and transfer went well...Well the trip had its ups and downs but over all we had a great experience and I hope I am pregnant! With every thing leading up to the transfer I did not think about waiting to see if it took, I just assumed it would work. So now I have a appointment on Thursday to see if I am pregnant. More waiting!
I think I am pregnant because I can feel that my uterus is BIGGER! But I second guess my self because I am on the hormones and they could be making me "swell". I have been looking online for more info on a transfer and it seems to be the consensus that if it takes it takes you can do nothing to help it or hurt it. One website said the uterus is a weightless environment! That is crazy to think inside each women in a space that is like...space! I hope it holds on and I am able to give the parents the best gift on earth, life.
I think I am pregnant because I can feel that my uterus is BIGGER! But I second guess my self because I am on the hormones and they could be making me "swell". I have been looking online for more info on a transfer and it seems to be the consensus that if it takes it takes you can do nothing to help it or hurt it. One website said the uterus is a weightless environment! That is crazy to think inside each women in a space that is like...space! I hope it holds on and I am able to give the parents the best gift on earth, life.
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Transfer!!!
the bubble on the left has the tiny embrio in it. yea!!!
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I have a little tiny embrio inside me! I am so happy to do this for the couple the Doc told me they have been tring for over 7 years. They have become pregnant MANY TIMES, naturaly and through IVF but each time she lost the baby. My heart beraks for these parents to go up to 12 weeks then loose a child would be so hard. Pray that this baby likes my "oven" and stays in it for at least 9 months!
The transfer was not bad. They had to clean me out because of the medicine I have been taking so that was unconfortable but it only took about 10 min. To think all this waiting for 10 min! I am a little sore but I am going to just take it easy and I hope to find out if it took in a couple of weeks!
Our trip to New York City has been great! We walked around this morrning so we could rest after the transfer. I still need to go to Carlo's Bakery but I hope to go right befor I leave for Las Vegas.
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Delta...ick
Ticket date was wrong so we have to take a later flight. I did not have anyones personal phone number at the agency so I had to email everyone and hope someone checked it. They did sooooo happy and now we are on a later flight, thank God! It got a little stressfull!
This is the lady that checked us in and twice as I was talking to her she just started talking to someone else...not liking Delta
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Tuesday, August 3, 2010
check, check, check
We have a babysitter, dog-sitter, house-sitter, and a way to get to the airport! I feel much better and a day in advance! That never happens with me...I guess I am turning over a new leaf.
Do not know the effects of the Progesterone and estrogen but last night I could not eat enough food to save my life! I have been soooo good at not over eating and being satisfied and I just through that all out the window! This morning I was still full so I did not eat till 11 am. I talked to the Nurse at the Fertility clinic yesterday and I had been taking a double dose of estrogen because the bottle said two a day but I wrote one a day so I doubted myself and took two a day. The Nurse laughed at me when I told her I took two a day! I think it is a big deal... I wonder why?
That is for another time :-)
Do not know the effects of the Progesterone and estrogen but last night I could not eat enough food to save my life! I have been soooo good at not over eating and being satisfied and I just through that all out the window! This morning I was still full so I did not eat till 11 am. I talked to the Nurse at the Fertility clinic yesterday and I had been taking a double dose of estrogen because the bottle said two a day but I wrote one a day so I doubted myself and took two a day. The Nurse laughed at me when I told her I took two a day! I think it is a big deal... I wonder why?
That is for another time :-)
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