Ups and downs

The babies are still is the hospital. They were doing so well we thought they would be home by now. They both got gas in their tummies so they had to stop eating and were put back on IV. Andrew is eating again and should be off IV today but Michael just started to eat again yesterday. They are still hovering around the 5 pound mark because of all this. The parents are hoping to bring Andrew home soon if everything goes well.
The parents have to take both babies to San Francisco to get the babies their passes to China and they have asked if I can go with them! We will only be there a day but it will be fun, I have only driven through San Francisco once. It is such a cute town with great architecture. I am so glad to be able to help them. I think traveling with two newborns is still daunting to them. This will be their trial run for the trip to China. Small compared to the 14 hour trip to China but I hope both go well.
I am into the 150's! Whoop, whoop! 159 lbs as of yesterday that is 10 pounds under my start weight! Keep it going!

Milk has come in

I pumped this morning and I got 11 oz. of milk! Glad my milk came in. I am doing well on my weight also. Today I am down to 164 lbs! That is 5 pounds under my start weight before I was pregnant. I just want to continue to eat small healthy meals so that I can be healthy. I will be glad when I can start exercising again but I always gain weight when I do. I think my body gains muscle faster than anything, it is loosing the fat that is my issue.
I am feeling so much better today. I put frankincense on last night again and I can actually move around without being in tons of pain and the swelling just keeps going down. I have even stopped taking my Motrin! I hope this keeps up, I was in a lot of pain the day before yesterday. I hate taking pills.

Stairs

Oh stairs, you are so daunting! I decide to try to climb the stairs yesterday to sleep in my own bed. It was not as bad as I thought it would be. Even going down was ok. I am glad to know I am able but I still do not want to go up or down them that often.
I stopped taking the pain meds the doc gave me, they were making me swell.  I would only take 2 or so a day and about 30 minutes after I could even feel my face swelling. Although I am still taking the Motrin. Also I am putting frankincense and Past Tense on my belly to help with swelling and pain. It has made a big difference! It still hurts when I move but I would rather hurt a little more than be swollen and feel weird all over.
I think I am healing ok. I feel my muscles tighten up which freaks me out a little and pains here and there even if I am not moving around. I hope I never have to have a c-section again! I was up walking around at Wal-Mart 2 days after I had my other babies naturaly. Big difference.

Home sweet home

I was released yesterday and it was perfect timing because the parents arrived just as I was released. We went right over to see the babies and they are doing great! They never needed oxygen and now are out of the warmers! They do still have an IV but are weaning off of it the more they eat.
I am so happy they are doing so well! They should be able to get out soon. We found out yesterday it is $7000 per day, per child for their care! It seems crazy to me since they are doing so well to be charging that much.
I was worried about my milk supply not coming in fast enough but it has steadily been growing and I am now pumping 5 oz every 3 hours. I need to keep it up because I know with two growing boys they will need to eat a lot. I am still sore and my belly is still numb but I am able to move a little better each day.

They are here!

Michael (on the left) was born first  on December at 10:07 am weighing 5 lbs and is 18 inches long. Andrew was born at 10:08 am also at 5 lbs but just a little shorter at 17 3/4 inches. The babies are being very good for the doctors at the hospital. They have not needed any oxygen and will try to eat from a bottle tomorrow. The only other thing they need to do to get released is keep their temp regular.
I am doing good I have taken my walk after the epidural wore off and I was finally able to eat. It was not much but I was good since I have not eaten all day. Now it is time to rest.

Hospital stay

So I am not going home until after I deliver these two little boys. I am 6 cm dilated and the contractions are not stopping. I am on magnesium which is not too bad but not fun either. I want to keep these boys in as long as possible I just don't think they are willing to stay.
I talked to the parents and they are upset they will not be here but trust me to do the best for their babies. I am sad that they will not be here for the birth too. I would not want to miss the birth of my child for anything. They are changing their flight so they can come to LV this week.
I am praying that these boy's lungs are developed enough to not be in the NICU. There is no room in the NICU at this hospital so if they need to go they have to be transfered. I wish I knew that before I came in I would of gone to the other hospital. I feel better if we all stay together.
I was checked an hour and a half ago and there is still no word on when or who will do my surgery. My doctor is out of town until Monday and her associate seems like he does not want to do the surgery. That's ok I don't like him n-e-ways but I do need to have the babies before my water breaks. Baby A is still breach and last time we checked both babies had their cords by my cervix which is not good. I came to terms with having a c-section but I am nervous now that my doctor is not going to do the surgery. I know God will take care of me and the babies and I just need to rest in his peace.

9 contractions in an hour!

Tonight I have had the most contractions thus far, 9 in an hour! I have a monitor system that tracks my contractions for an hour and sends it to a nurse to evaluate me. The nurse is calling my doctor to see what they want me to do. I think I am at my max for meds to be taken at home. The next step is going into the hospital and going magnesium.....she just called back. Doc wants me to go into the hospital.

Wiped out

The past two days have been full of contractions and medication. One pill brings my blood pressure down and the other makes my heart race but together they lighten my contractions. It is taking a toll on me to be on these medications and I felt it today. I slept most of the day but it is at night I wish I could just fall asleep but it is hard when you heart is pounding. Just a couple more weeks please!

32 weeks 5 days

I had an appointment today with an ultrasound. I am 1 cm dilated which is not too big of deal because many women are dilated 1cm at this point and go to 40 weeks. I don't think I will make it to 40 weeks but it gives me some level of comfort. I opted to take the steroids to help the babies lungs ans eyes develop if they come early. Baby A is still breach...that little stinker. Both babies have their cords down by my cervix. That is very bad for natural birth so my doctor said we will have to go with a c-section if everything stays the same. I have come to terms with having a c-section from talking to everyone I can about how their c-section went. I know everyone is different but I have found comfort in hearing how theirs went.
They measured the babies, baby A is 4lbs 11oz and baby B is 4lbs 15 oz, about 5lbs each. This is just an estimate but I feel it is a pretty good one. They have each gained 1lb in two weeks which is normal. I am hoping to have them after Christmas and both weight about 6lbs 8oz. I am kinda excited at the possibility of having the babies on the 27th. I have two nephews born December 27th and how cool would it be to have these babies on the same day! They won't be my baby's but I will never forget their birthday and I get to share a special day with my sisters in law. :-)
As I was driving to my doctors appointment it hit me. I could possibly be in the hospital for Christmas! I almost burst into tears but I decided to hold it in because I did not want to scare my kids by blubbering for no apparent reason. I don't know what I will do if I have to be in the hospital for Christmas but I will know I will be very sad. The days just keep going by so I hope I make it until after Christmas.

If you have a c-section story I would love to hear about it. Post it in the comments.

Red...purple!

I was taking a shower and my legs started to feel weird, a weak tingling feeling. So I looked down and my legs were bright red with purple veins running down them! I freaked! I got out of the shower as fast as I could to go lay down. My legs went right back to their normal whiteness quickly and I was ecstatic! I monitored just to be sure that the leg issue did not cause any contractions. I was fine only 4 contractions that hour (that's low for me at this point.).
This weekend was ruff with 2 monitoring at 8 contractions in an hour. I am now on double the medications that I was on before and it is not all fun. Sleeping seams to be evading me even when I use my lavender oil, I feel like my body is quivering and weak. No fun stuff.
I am going to try to do some leg exercises to help strengthen my legs and blood vessels. I can't do anything like squats, which is my go to exercise for legs. Even side leg lifts cause a contraction. So, I am left with laying on my side squeezing my calfs by lifting my foot up and down. It feels good to move my legs and feel the strength in them again. I am very careful to make sure my stomach is relaxed as I "workout." It is more important for me not to be contracting than to exercise. I hope it helps.

Bedrest

It has been a long journey this pregnancy with more complications than I would of liked. The first transfer dis not work so we tried again and they decide to put in 2 embryos. Low and behold I am pregnant with twins!
The first trimester was uneventful but the second was full of twists and turns. At the beginning of the second trimester I had a massive bleeding episode because a piece of placenta ripped away from my uterus. That was the scariest thing I have ever encountered. I bled for 45 mins straight! It took 3 weeks to fully stop but I was so glad it did. I was on bedrest for the 3 weeks plus a couple extra to just be sure everything was ok. At the end of the second trimester I has an ultrasound to check my cervix and it was just over 1 cm shortened. Your cervix shortens then opens, I should of been over 3 cm at that point. So it was back on bedrest for me.
I am now 32 weeks and still on bedrest. It did not bother me at first because I am always going it was nice to just relax. Now I am so tired of asking everyone to do everything for me. I just want to get up and do it myself. I am also very lonely. I am a very social person and I miss people! My husband has been taking our kids to all their events, which is great but I end up being alone for long periods of time. I can't wait to get back to my normal routine of being with my family all day.
I hope to keep these boys in until 36 weeks at least so they can develop well and their parents can get here. The parents should be here just after Christmas. I am glad they are spending Christmas with their first son before they come here for over a month. They are going to stay with us again for a month after the babies are born so I can pump for them. Just a little boost before they go back to China.

Little Baby Embryo

I hope this little baby embryo gets a helping hand from God,
Their big brother did and he brought great joy to there Mom & Dad,
I would be so privileged to help you come into this world,
I may not get to see you every day but I know you are special in so many ways,
You will bring great joy and have the love to do great things,
You are a blessing God has to ordain and I will be soooooo delighted if he chooses for you to stay.

I find out tomorrow!

Time for the transfer!

We made it to NYC  after a layover in DC and now we are waiting to go up stairs. I slept most of the way on the first plane but it was so hard to wake up! I am glad that I had a little nap before we left. I am going to

Control...

I like control. To be in control of my house, life, daily decisions, and so on. But with the surrogacy I have to let others be in control. I can't make my own flight plans, dictate when I will do the transfer, what meds I will take...and SO much more. God has shown me through this process to let go of the control I want to have over every thing in my life and let him lead me. When I let God lead the way I feel more at peace than ever before and it all works out so much better.
 I am not my own, I am his.

Sore or unusable?

Ok so yesterday's stick was not as bad as I thought it would be. Although throughout the day my leg hurt more and more and formed a bruise. Now I am not sure if I should stick the other leg or stay with the same leg and just baby it. Ugh! It would be so much better if I just took the pill only like last time.
Time to go stab myself.

First shot!

Very nervous about taking my first progesterone shot. I have had friends take this and could not walk because it hurt so bad! Here I go

Time for the meds!

I normally do not mind taking meds but I have to stick myself! I have had several friends that have taken this medicine and it hurts! Not looking forward to this :-(
On the good side of things I will have the transfer next Monday the 16th! Finally! I feel like this has taken so long. I pray that the little embryo will take and William can soon have a little brother or sister. The mom want a little girl but are happy with either. So think pink!

Chinese New Year

The parents came to spend Chinese New Year with us. This showed me yet again how much they really love our family. In China all the people go home to spend time with their family for the New Year and they came to see us. They did not bring William with them this time :-( It is ok because we are going to China in February! They offered for us to take a tour of China but we miss them so much that we would rather stay with them for the ten days that we are there. They are already planing to come to America every year to see us and want to take us to Japan on another vacation! It will be nice to have travel buddies :-) on this trip we will go to Shanghai, Honzou, then up to Beijing to see the great wall. It should be a great trip with lots of new experiences. I am nervous to go to another country because of illnesses, strict laws, and the what ifs but I find great comfort in God. God has blessed this journey from the beginning and I have faith that he will be with us in our travels.
I was so excited that the parents were coming I cleaned and organized my entire house. Now I just have to make sure it stays organized. They like our new house much better than our old house and so do I. I am looking forward to owning our own house one day soon, I hope. We will be one step closer to owning our own home this March when we start the process to have another baby for them! I am very glad we can help the same family as we did before because we have such a great connection. There is not a day that goes by that we do not think of their family and I think it is the same for them. They are so greatful and humble and I feel so greatful to them, and hope I am humble too, it is just so nice that we both think of each other so much. I really love them so much that I cannot even explain.